my feet hit the pavement again and again and as i ran and ran and ran, tears slipped down. in my head, this thought resurfaced again and again: "she abandoned you, and time is only taking her farther away from you." there is this fear blossoming in me that it's too late and that i'll never be able to reach her. i ran harder and faster. God, it's true that i feel abandoned by her.

i looked out upon a thriving open green space. there was one, two, three, four streams that cut across the land and snaked through flourishing trees. and in my vision, i saw boulder-like jewels that glistened and sparkled and flashed before my eyes. soon after, i saw a storm of dragonflies that filled the picture before me. Dragonflies loomed before me, flying in and out of my sight of vision. 

Immanuel. You are with me. 

that my brokenness would be the backdrop of what you did for me.

three different times I begged the Lord to take it away. Each time he said, "My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness."

My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.
My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.

But God showed his great love for me by sending Christ to die for me while I was still a sinner.

you can never relive the experiences that you miss. and i count those experiences as blessings because God brought them about in a way that only He can. there's something so profoundly special about encountering yourself, the people around you, and God in a new way. I will never ever forget my time working at the Shelter and the fellowship I had with my team and the Jordaan staff. truly, you added so much more to my heart.

God, you are so beautiful. Draw me closer to you & show me more of your heart. Grow the seeds you planted in my heart. i won't stop asking for more and more of your presence.



i lift up the Shelter Ministry in Amsterdam. God, I pray that you would draw those who are lost to the hostels and that you would minister to them through the staff and managers. God, I pray that your kingdom would come in the darkest areas in Amsterdam. i pray that your light would breach the darkness in human hearts. Father, I lift up to you the managers and staff at Shelter Jordaan. Blow in the caverns of their souls winds that will refresh them. I pray against weariness and attacks from the enemy - Father show them more of your heart for the travelers.Guide them in their conversations and interactions and I pray that you would be so manifest in the love of that community.

yes, more was added to my heart.
And I thank you.