Joys

One of the most formative experiences during my time here in Chicago has been going to Chicago Tabernacle's prayer meetings. Intercession is a gift that the Lord has placed in my heart, and I am quick to admit that the weekly prayer meetings have grown my heart for prayer and corporate worship. I truly believe that prayer is the medium that turns doubt into an act of faith, and thus worship. One of the biggest realizations has been the transformative effects of prayer - I believe that I have grown in love with the process, and not simply the end result of answered prayers. Because the thing is, God can and does answer prayers and while there are certain unanswered prayers that I have prayed for more than a decade, I also believe that God's timing is good and perfect. Lord, I thank you that as you show me your heart, my heart expands and softens in response.

These days, as I continually surrender to the Lord each day, I realize that I am getting better at hearing and listening to His voice. His promptings are becoming more familiar, and as I obey, I am aware of how He affirms my obedience. 

Thankful List:

-My spiritual mentor, Teretha (W O W. God, thank you for mentors. I foresee a season of accelerated growth and I thank you that you have put me on her heart to speak into my life). 

-Meditating on scripture 

-Iced coffee / soft-scrambled eggs 

-Rolling out of bed at 5 am to go for my long runs 

-Quiet mornings 

-The girls that I live with

-Random spontaneous haircuts 

Thankful List

Wow! Wow! So much to be thankful for! Here goes:

-Tuesday night bible study at Lisa Werner's house.

-My birthday this past Wednesday. I felt so incredibly loved by God from the moment I woke up to when I fell asleep. I had a 12-hour clinical that day on the inpatient psych unit but Sam and I have been joking that I can easily use this in a 'two truths and a lie' game.

Truth: I spent my 25th birthday on a lock-down psych unit at the hospital.

BUT! It only gets better because during group therapy, the occupational therapist led us in a form of tai chi and we did various movements focusing on our breathing. She also had us massage our heads.

Truth: I spent my 25th birthday on a lock-down psych unit at the hospital doing tai chi.

Gonna stow this one away with my other crazy truths.

Afterwards, I met up with some friends from school at Sultan's Market and we sat on the patio and then went to Handlebar afterwards and sat on the patio for dessert. Mae and Emilou started singing happy birthday to me, and the people sitting around us all joined in and it was one big festive birthday song. Ha ha!

I think the best part was that on Tuesday, my dad texted me saying happy birthday. Lord, thank you.
All in all, such a wonderful way to begin my 25th.

-Yesterday, I woke up to an email from Katie, a missionary who New Community Covenant Church supports. She and her family live in Columbia, and in the email (I've been in communication with them for a few months now), she invited me to come stay with them next month. Lord, THANK YOU! I have been praying for opportunities to get my toes wet in the mission field and seeing that I'll be on break next month, it seems that he has opened this door for me to go help out and simply love on Katie and her family. I went to small group last night, and as we were praying, I saw an image of a stoplight and the green light was on. Truly, I feel like the timing is right for me to go.
*Edit, I bought my tickets today and will be going next month from August 19 - August 28! Columbia, here I come.

-Thankful for small group and for everyone I've gotten to know. Thankful for Matt's hospitality and for his joy and love for food (and also for feeding us restaurant worthy food).

All in all, life is a whirlwind right now and my heart is full.

The Heart of Worship

When the music fades
All is stripped away
And I simply come
Longing just to bring
Something that's of worth
That will bless your heart
I'll bring you more than a song
For a song in itself
Is not what you have required
You search much deeper within
Through the way things appear
You're looking into my heart

I'm coming back to the heart of worship
And it's all about you,
It's all about you, Jesus
I'm sorry, Lord, for the thing I've made it
When it's all about you,
It's all about you, Jesus

King of endless worth
No one could express
How much you deserve
Though I'm weak and poor
All I have is yours
Every single breath

I'll bring you more than a song
For a song in itself
Is not what you have required
You search much deeper within
Through the way things appear
You're looking into my heart 

-Michael W. Smith