Friday, February 26, 2021

Thankful List

 -Providing vaccine education at a long-term facility yesterday. I have loved going into different facilities with Meg, Kierra, Amanda, and Jose. I love and appreciate my coworkers so much! Seriously couldn't imagine doing the work we do without them. 

-Group chats with Janet and Julian. Very thankful for both of these friends and the ways in which they bring joy and laughter into my life. 

-Getting to talk to my mentor, Teretha. So it's been a while since I caught up with her but WOW - whenever I talk to her, I experience the presence and love of God. As we were praying for each other, she encouraged me to be patient regarding certain prayer requests that have been on my heart. She encouraged me to "tie up the loose ends"in the meantime; believe me, there are definitely a few loose ends in my life that I can work on. I'm feeling super encouraged and just so thankful for Teretha and how she abides in the Lord and makes him her priority. 

-20 oz. pineapple candles that I get at Target for $10  as opposed to the 6 oz. pineapple candle Julian gets for $15 (!!). Like what!?!?

-Friday + working from home = fantastic combo. 

Tuesday, February 16, 2021

40 Days

 I feel the reverberations of the past -- 

the beginnings of a shift soon to come.

I signed up to pray early in the morning for the next 40 days 

because I sense in my spirit a beckoning, a nudge to 

commune in familiar spaces

even as he takes me into unfamiliar ones. 

Saturday, February 13, 2021

The Heart of the Matter

My heart contains 
traces of 
gold&mud 
cracks that span 
a foreign land 

If only you would traverse 
down 
down 
down 
into the 
murky depths
where the echoes reside 

You would find 
the extraordinary and the ordinary
dwelling side-by-side.
You would find 
the line dividing good and evil -- what 
will you do?

Will you destroy a piece of your heart,
strive towards cultivating the good?
Will you turn a blind eye, and ignore 
the muck and the mire? 

There is a clarion call that 
finds me in the abyss -
a call to come and die.
A call to come as I am, 
open palms etched with psalms 
heart wide open, 
    gold&mud.

Saturday, February 6, 2021

Immanuel

I'm entering into this space with so much gratitude. Earlier this week, I went out to shovel my car out of the snow to go to work and as I was knee-deep trying to maneuver around my car without falling over, a car pulled up and a man yelled, "hey! you need some help?" I looked over and said that I was ok and that he didn't have to get out of his car. The man went on to hop out of his car with a huge shovel and helped me dig my car out. Before he went back to his car, I gratefully asked him what his name was and that I had never seen him on the block. He smiled and said, "oh, I live over on the next block. My name is Immanuel." He proceeded to hop in his car and drive away and I stood there shaking my head with a smile on my face.

The next morning, I picked up my coworker, Kierra, and as we were driving on lakeshore at 50 mph, my front hood popped open and slammed against my front windshield. Yup, you read that right. It was like a scene from 'Tommy Boy' except that this was real-life.  I drove blindly for a good 10 seconds or so and was able to slow down, put on my blinkers, and pull over to the side on lakeshore drive. Hopping out of my car, I attempted to pull my hood back down but the torque from the wind had jammed my hood upright against the windshield. Kierra had to get out of the passenger side and after a bit of struggling we were able to slam it back down. I just want to highlight two important observations that lead me to speak of God's protection. During that moment when my hood slammed upright, no cars were on lakeshore except for mine. Mind you, this was Tuesday morning at the height of rush hour. I 100% believe that if there was a car in front of me or even to my side, we would have gotten into a major accident. Second, the windshield didn't shatter when the hood slammed into it. I can only imagine worst-case scenarios in which Kierra and I were not only driving blindly on lakeshore, but were exposed to flying shattered glass. Thank goodness that scenario didn't happen. 

After this incident, I was definitely on high-alert when driving my car for the rest of the week. On Thursday, as I was driving home from work, my check engine light came on and I took it as a sign that there was something else going in with my car and that I should take it to my mechanic. Yesterday, I dropped it off early and was informed that my engine had overheated to 300 degrees when the check engine light came on. Joe Jr. and his crew had to put in two gallons of coolant (clearly I need to be better about checking coolant levels in my car) and replace the temperature gauge (which had snapped). After a slight dent in my wallet, I was able to take it home in the later afternoon. 

Wowza. What a week. To loop back to the beginning of this post, I just want to emphasize how this is how I experience the Lord. He is a good Father to me, intentional in the way he gently encourages me and reminds me of his presence in my life. Truly, this week has been a reminder of the meaning of Immanuel, or God with us. God with me.